These Chickens Are A Menace

The Stare Down Between Canine and Poultry

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We have three Barred Rock hens, who have to be kept behind this enclosure here, not for their own safety, but for all of ours. I am not exaggerating when I say these chickens are a menace to society... Okay, maybe a bit. I am prone to being a bit dramatic. Life's more fun that way. Living a dull life is for the dead, even then I've known a few corpses who are more lively than a lot of people my age. Getting back to the story here, these hens are something else. Much like their Velociraptor ancestors, they terrorize everything in their path. I watched one swallow a snake whole. It should be noted it was a very tiny snake, a Florida Crowned Snake, but still, that's an impressive amount of violence. They're constantly trying to one up each other. One always has to run and bang into the other, their hackles go up, they get in each other's faces, beak to beak never breaking eye contact, so as to not lose one's status as the toughest chicken in the barnyard. I swear these hens are voluntary cock fighters. When they're not going at it with each other, then it's with us, or the dogs. We'll be minding our own business, and they'll run up to us like they have something to prove. I am being harassed by a five pound bird in my own backyard. Then of course there's the worst of the worst. I mean I can handle the attacks, but dear God don't touch my plants. They're sneaky little buggers too. They'll walk by ever so casually not even looking at it, clucking, scratching in the dirt, popping a few bugs, then bam! They pluck at my cantaloupes, or my tomatoes. These chickens better be careful, because I am extremely close to plucking one of them. Not really, but you know what I mean. The little bird brains are stepping on some toes here.

Honestly, all joking aside, I love to kid around about the chickens, because it's so easy. I truly believe that every little farm needs chickens. True free range eggs are the tops. Those so called free range eggs you get in the market are a joke, yet still better than caged, but still a joke. I can't wait until they start laying so I can do a video showing side by side the differences. It is huge. So not only do you get a delicious source of protein, but you also get laugh after laugh, because chickens are just about the funniest animals on the planet.

Thanks for reading,

Marissa